[caption id=”” align=”aligncenter” width=”250” caption=”Put Your Hard Hat On”][/caption]

As you sit there today and think, “man, I got the day off”. Remember, 8.2% of the employable have been off for awhile. I don’t want to “rain on your parade” but I am. Over and over I hear about how much someone hates their job. This is America, you have the right and freedom to do what you want if you have training or schooling.

Most people forget what Labor Day is, it is a holiday to be proud and show off what this country, as one, has produced. From the milk of a dairy farmer to that Ford out on the road. Instead we (me included) spend all day bitching about how everything is closed and how we don’t get what to do.

For all those people that have lost jobs or have no drive, this part is for you. What is the one thing you want to do and what do you want to give to the world? Whatever it is, don’t be scared. People laughed at me when I said I wanted to do stand up comedy, most times I would have liked that but not this time. From then on I have never laughed or tried to discourage anyone from their dream. Every rapper started at the bottom, most comedians started at an open Mic, and every actor had to do independent films.

Now, if you’re one of the unemployed, there is a silver lining. Now that you have time either go back to school or put in energy to a hobby or dream you have. We still have a lot to show the world.

With all that said, also enjoy the fruits of your labor. Go to your local parade, enjoy your family’s barbeque sleep in.

Original Article

My lovely father turned 60 today and he’s already yelling at furniture. I know it is very cliche for people to say “my dad is the hardest working man I know” or “my father has been the best father a boy could have”. Well let me tell you a little something about my pops.

He started working when he was only 6 years old. Do the math, that’s 54 years of hard labor. His mother passed away when he was only 4. He never really knew who his actual father was, some guy just claimed to be and he accepted it.

The stories that he has told me that happened before he was 15 are amazing. For example, in his early teens he was hired by a rancher to herd some cattle for three days, by himself. That’s way more responsibility than most grown men can take. When I asked him why he couldn’t just say no he said, “you gotta work to eat”.

The life he has lived and how far he has come is a true success, american dream story. To go from working in the fields at a very young age to selling gum (chicklets) on the street to working the fields even more. Then coming to the states, raise a family on minimum wage picking everything from oranges, berries to limes. He also worked washing dishes at a really nice restaurant, it was awesome when he could bring some leftover rice to our small trailer. Best of times in my opinion.

Another thing that I admire of my pops is how not only was he able to leave his own country for California but he left California for Kentucky. At least in California people spoke Spanish, here in Paducah, not so much. I can’t even move out without freaking out about bills.

Once he got here we were able to establish ourselves very nicely. After about 10 years of hard work, in his part, he has a successful lawn care and landscaping business.

This man has done more than anyone else I know to provide for his family and keep it moving forward. He never once thought, “this is hard, I should just leave my wife and kids for something easier”. He has done the best possible job a man can do.

I hope to be the man he became at 14 when I turn 30. Thanks dad for everything you do. You’ll never be able to read this but maybe some day I’ll be man enough to say it to you.

Original Article

Tonight I was told something that only happens once in a blue moon, ironically. More people watched “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” than the actual Republican National Convention. Have we gotten to the point where we as a nation either don’t care or we just accept the result and the inevitable? This, instead of becoming a solution, has become a fight between two people that don’t really know what is going on. Its a spectacle nowadays. I just hope we vote Honey Boo Boo in. She’s small, knows nothing and you can’t understand her when she’s speaks, so she should have a hand over Obama and Romney. Just keep this in mind, the people voting now are mostly people that watch Jersey Shore, Hoarders, and every singing competition out there. That’s what this race has become, a reality TV show. No one is going to fix much if anything. Money runs this country and we as a nation including the government have negative of it. No matter who is elected this country is ran by Banks and whatever corporation decides to make us their bitch.

Original Article

I was never fortunate enough to go off to some big school and join a fraternity. I had to go to a small community college and without realizing, helped start a frat of my own. A true brotherhood, I didn’t have to pay to get in or go through a bullshit initiation. We have come together through the power of laughter, all of us sharing a gift to make people laugh. Its a gift that everyone has but no one utilizes it. Almost immediately, from the start, this ensemble was different. The ages ranging from 23-42 didn’t matter, we all had and still have one goal… to make people laugh. It is honestly a rare group of people. I say rare not only because of the talent but because of the unity and stabilization of the group. Paducah, KY does not have a good reputation when it comes to comedy and for an improv group to be created here and have 3 very successful first shows and no signs of stopping is absolutely amazing. For the past 4 years I as a stand up comic wanted to start something great in this town, and I think I have finally helped with something worth speaking about. One of my favorite things about these guys is that no one ever says “that’s the funniest thing I have ever heard” which is super annoying. I wish I could tell you about every individual member of this group but I can’t, it would take to long. I am basically saying I love my improv brothers and I hope you guys realize how special they are. Looking back, I’m glad I didn’t leave this town. This is one of the greatest accomplishments of my life.

Original Article

For any of you that live in Paducah, the riverfront has probably been one of your best friends. It’s a place to go visit when you’re sad, especially happy and when you need to ponder things. As a matter of fact im sitting at this place as I write this. In my opinion the best thing about this place and its historic surroundings is that even if the river does, this place never changes, and it has always remained peaceful. I remember I came down here right after my first open Mic of stand up, four years later after being from NYC to LA and a lot of places in between, after successfully helping asemble an Improv group in Paducah, I still find myself here. I’ve been to a lot of places but there’s no place like this for inspiration. Here it feels like time… Sits still for awhile. I hope this place never changes, it is perfect.

Original Article

I think I have gotten to the age where marriage and the thought of it surround me. So many friends I graduated with are now married or recently engaged. This concept is insane to me. I feel, and maybe because its true, that I’m super young and have many plans and goals I can only accomplish if I don’t tie the knot. I’m still a child in my moms, mines and my girlfriends eyes. Of course it has crossed my mind but then I think about it, if I want to go on a road trip to the mountains, I can do that because I wouldn’t have obligations. And of course it would be easier not to worry about anyone else if I got eaten by a bear.

Long blog… just as long. Consider that choice before making it, almost 50% of couples get divorced. Of course it can also get expensive. Its like a cell phone contract that never expires, anytime you cancel, you get hit with fees.

Original Article

Beautiful day in Florida.

Spending a week in Panama City Beach, FL. With people that are willing to go out and try new things (not my family) is great. Every conversation that I have with these people goes like this “I want to try this restaurant”. “OK”.

On my first night here we all went to Sharky’s where I experienced a delicious tilapia. The taste along with a beach side atmosphere took me back to hanging out at the Santa Barbara pier. The sound of waves crashing, a nice breeze, the salty smell of the ocean and the sound of seagulls flying around looking for any leftovers they can find from the restaurants or the sea. It was a picture perfect dinner especially after I got me an alcoholic beverage that consisted of rum, rum, and coconut rum.

Our second day here we went to Dirty Dick’s. I had flounder at this place. The restaurant wasn’t as pleasant but the fish was delicious. I know what you’re thinking, this place sounds dirty. Its not, the restaurant was very clean and service was great. I know there’s a joke here but I can’t think of anything, maybe because I’m distracted by this itch I have.

On the third day we went to Pineapple Willy’s, which I’m pretty sure is owned by the same people that own Sharky’s. They serve their alcoholic beverages in a big zippy cup. I wasn’t very hungry here so I only got Alligator Tail from the appetizer section. It tasted like calamari. Here was my only issue with this place, and I don’t know if other restaurants do this or not, they make you dump out your alcohol if you’re not done with it. If I pay $10 a drink I expect to be able to take it home.

On the fourth day (today) I had probably the best day, culinary wise. We first went to Waffle House for breakfast. Nothing tops The All-Star at 9am. For lunch we went to Margaritaville where I had the coconut shrimp and some nachos. It was all delicious.

The reason I cut that last one so short was because I wanted to talk about this next gem of a restaurant. I absolutely loved FIVE GUYS Burgers and Fries! It was my first and last time because my home town doesn’t have one. I asked for a double cheeseburger with lettuce, tomato, grilled onion, pickles, ketchup and mustard. The anticipation was killing me, I had heard of how magical those burgers were on the Food Network so it had to be true.
You know when you already have your whole experience planned out in your head? Whether its going to buy a video game and going straight home to play it? Or when you plan a trip and it goes perfect? No detours.
I had imagined going into this place, ordering my burger, waiting a couple of minutes, sitting next to a window by myself and bite into two patties covered with beautiful american cheese.
But here is what happened.
I have my girlfriend drop me off while she circles around to pick me up. As soon as I enter, the place is packed. A good 10-15 minute wait. I order and call my girl to get me in a few minutes, this is the part where my whole dream of sitting in is shattered. I finally get it and do to traffic its taking her a bit. Ten minutes later we are on the road to the hotel which is about 30 minutes away due to traffic, 5 without. Halfway way to the hotel we stop at a pier where I can eat my burger. To my wonderful surprise it is still warm, the only problem is that I’m standing with no where to sit unless I want grease on my new shorts.
Every bite I took felt like butter but with the taste of glorious unicorn meat. It was perfect. I have absolutely nothing bad to say about it. The onions were cooked perfectly, not too big not too small. They didn’t drown it in ketchup or mustard and it didn’t smell like old grease, something Johnny Rockets should learn. It was a wonderful experience.

This is what I see

This week I’m in Panama City Beach. The view from atop our hotel room shows the real beauty of this (Sexually Transmitted Infection Deceased) town. Beautiful beaches and 15+ story resorts take over the shore. You can smell the salty scent of the ocean, or is it the lady in the one piece tanning, sweating as if she were a stick of butter on a Florida sidewalk?
This town is where, usually, only people with money come. On any given March-April you will see the most annoying young people in the US driving around their fancy cars picking up “classy” ladies to take them back to a $200 a night villa. Every girls dream, right?
Today, though, its a beautiful mid July day and as oppose to spring break. The sounds and scents of douche baggery only reveal themselves at night. July or any other time of the year, except spring break, is a great time to come enjoy sunny northwest Florida. Today I swam with dolphins and it was pretty bad ass. OK, maybe $175 to swim with them was over board. You say to yourself “Jorge, you could have bought so much with that.” True, but it was worth it. Although the high def camera that was used to take pictures of us was an asshole, it made me look fat and super white. I looked like a white belly fish, disgusting. Needless to say I did not buy pictures of me swimming, dancing or kissing the incredibly smart sea mammal.
If you can put up with drunk people “hootin” and “hollerin”, obnoxious teenagers thinking drinking is still cool, and young guys thinking PCB is a nest of easy “birds” which it is if they play their cards right, by cards I mean money and by play I mean spend, then you can have a decent vacation.
Don’t eat too much seafood, I will not give details.